Unoffishal Sept 04

Apparently, Rich Hall - "My motto is 'leave me or I'll find someone who will'" quit his job as a 'hurricane-namer' 18 years ago. Pieces of information like this make me realise I've got a very dull CV. What would mine say: "20 years of sex, interrupted occasionally to write some music and go to the shops." My motto: "Ready to take my life in my own hands and f*ck it up in a different way!!!"

Thought for the Day : "When did mediocrity and banality become a good thing?" (Wild) Bill Hicks

On my way outta town at the moment, but listened to "Sounds of the Underworld", the Bannerman's compilation CD. There's a band about 14th in the track listing, The Last Great Wilderness, with a song called 'American Pornography': gave me chills. Absolutely GREAT. Read the review on the 'Listening To...' page.

""The Full Moon Music Club (First Thursday of the month @ Bannermans, Edinburgh) is proud to launch its first compilation C.D. on the 7th of October. Because there are 10 different acts featured on the disc, all bar one will be playing live at the launch party, so the first act will be on at 8 p.m. sharp. Here's the running order and timings for what is sure to be a great night:

As I said, it's a very full bill, so if you want to see William Mysterious (and I suggest you do!) get there by 8.""

I'm on 'late' between two popular bands: MIYAGI and Z28's. I'll have to pull a miracle (or a reasonably hot performance) out of my ass to stand up there alone in between these two and keep the audience inspired. Short and sweet is the best tactic (and like no clothes! or maybe dressed as some other species; i.e. wood louse... Carcaradon... something with a twist). Norman has kindly offered to play some fuzz guitar over both Kitty Kitty and Jonny Cash. If you miss it, you can always buy the CD.

25 September 2004 - Sat - Thought for the Day : "He suddenly departs never to return. Who will notice there is one person less?" T'ao Ch'ien (AD 372-427)

Never went to see Brundlefly or Norman... got caught up with Deirdre and her crises. These emergency calls! Sister in same boat.. to Barcelona next week. Comfort program and yes... she needs love. They need love.

Jim to London.. me to 'Irish Leaving Do' tonight and to Bannerman's tomorrow night: MELA playing with new guitarist. Maybe go have look.

Tonight at Bannerman's: been invited to see Norman Lamont & the Innocents strut their eclectic song stuff followed by Scuff and Brundlefly (Victorian rock?). Lindsay the bass player is both an 'Innocent' and the leader of Brundlefly.. so it's a trip to understand the join. Been listening to the 'Underworld' compilation CD. Greystar and The Sengen stand out. I'm thinking of doing a quick little review of the 20 or so tracks. Make a note to see those bands. Someone else mentioned them to me ages ago.

Jimmy Miller in the studio tomorrow putting down basics for a new song - "Walls Come Down" - and then in London next week doing some pre-production with Jim L. While backing up 20 or so rough song ideas he'd banged down, was once again taken by the breadth of his talent. It just flows out of him, like water down a mountainside. Nothing calculated or 'cute'. So natural and completely, yes, breathtaking.

Going through the tracks on the Natural E project. Really have neglected it for some time now.. like a year or so, maybe more. Must focus, maybe somehow and complete the recordings. At present it's a concept on this website and some rough tracks strewn together on a sample CD.

**Someone mentioned Joss Stone to me? I'm sure she's a very lovely girl, but I don't like things that are packaged and 'sold' to me as 'marvelous'. I prefer artists to be less 'main-stream' cheesy advertising and more subversive/message oriented. I don't really like anything that comes to me mainlined down the IV tube of primetime TV in that grotesquely over-rated style so typical of our deplorably shallow consumer culture. They're trying to sell Joss Stone to me as this earthy but sexy bit of lychen growing on the tradition of real rock n' roll soul. My preferred understanding:.. rolling stones.. gather no moss (or lichen). Someone I do like is PJ Harvey. Her 'ad' ran back to back with Miss Stone's on primetime TV, but PJ's soundbyte and visualbyte were so mysterious and intriguing. Yes.. I like that lady.

Last night, champagne courtesy of Stephen Lightley at Oloroso, followed by dinner at the Hallion Club courtesy of John Hall. Great conversation, food, companions. What were we celebrating? Being alive and pain-free.

Meanwhile, back in the real world; came home to the news that another hostage in Iraq had his head sawed off and a third is awaiting his fate. It's very difficult to enjoy what you perceive as an 'ok night out' when reminded people are suffering so deeply elsewhere (EVERYWHERE!) and lives hang agonizingly in the balance.

The Incredible String Band: A History, by Norman Lamont: ""A friend wrote : the Incredible String Band. Are they like the Electric Light Orchestra?

I replied: Not quite! They started in Glasgow in about '66 doing traditional folk and skiffle; they had quite a successful album after which they split up and Robin Williamson went to Morocco, coming back with a bagful of weird instruments and a headful of weird scales; the ISB reformed as a duo of Robin and Mike Heron, who had bought a sitar, created a selection of madly eclectic albums mixing mysticism, superb poetry, mythology, folk, cabaret, rock, and anything else that came to mind. Often in the course of one song! They basically invented world music, but there was nothing authentic in their borrowings from different cultures, just a desire for a twangy sound here or a swooshy sound there. They were the archetypal hippies, living communally, ingesting masses of psychedelics [editor's note: that's the part I like!] and using their friends and family instead of 'proper' musicians. After a few years, Mike Heron gained the ascendancy and steered them towards more conventional rock. They broke up in 74, Mike for a fairly unsuccessful rock songwriting career and Robin for a more successful niche as poet, writer and wandering bard. By the 90s they'd been more or less forgotten by all but a handful of fanatics who ran a fanzine and discovered they weren't alone in the world. By the influence of the fanzine, the ISB albums started to get re-released and interest in the band accumulated. The feud between Robin and Mike was overcome and they had a couple of reunion encounters. However when Mike wanted to start touring again the split reasserted itself and Mike now tours with a band calling itself the ISB but without Robin it's a pale shadow.""

U.N. appointed "International 'Peace' Day": There's supposed to be a 'cease-fire' in all conflicts around the world on this day. Read the news ("The Pre-Apocalyptic Times") and you'd never know.

Thought for the Day : "Not every end is the goal." - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche 1844-1900

I won't go into the details of what I saw while flicking through channels on Saturday Night: "Real Cosmetic Surgery" or whatever that program is called, but if this is 'real' in our culture, we're in real trouble. I have a theory about the rash of cosmetic 'refreshments' and procedures going on in the West, particularly in America (2 million!). For years the bestseller list was topped by self-help books for those seeking self-improvement from the inside. I suspect after 20 years of reading these books people realise it's easier to improve yourself from the outside.

After our 'CD' meeting on Friday evening, walked over to Bannerman's and had a couple of beers. Saw no band names that inspired staying on to watch, but did pick up a copy of Bannerman's promotional compilation CD. It looks good and has one song from each of about 20 bands on it. Only listened to the first track by Modus - "Rockstar". The female vocalist's voice reminded me of me when I first started singing. Just some of her tones. It's a nice track. You can get the CD from Bannerman's (just ask) (also possibly at FOPP and Avalanche). I think it's called 'The Underworld'. Something like that.

What shocked me most about this week's events; was not the 'PRO-Fox-hunting lobbyists' actually getting IN to the House of Commons (these neo-fascist new-rich/old-rich kids, i.e. Bryan Ferry's kid ('Otis' Ferry - as if giving him that name could ever give him 'soul') and that friend of Prince Harry's who's on the 'Polo' team). That didn't shock me. What shocked me absolutely most: they didn't break into the House of Commons protesting the War in Iraq, the repression of women and children in various cultures around the world, the tyranny of old religions, the loss of funding for the arts and libraries and culture, or the continued use of Fossil Fuels creating Global Warming or, even more monumentally gripping: the genocide in the Sudan. They broke into the House of Commons to protest the legal demise of a barbaric 'class-oriented' sport that allows them to ride roughshod over hill and dale as if they own the whole place and butcher a frightened creature at the end of it. That's how f*cked up these people really are. (They're priorities are a little screwed up too.)

PS - Tonight.. it seems the Full Moon CD is back on and I will be on it or 'Jonny Cash' and 'Kitty Kitty' will be on it. [Really must call Ian Jones. Someone remind me]. We met and kind of thrashed out something we could all live with. I told Mal about 'Otis Ferry' 'riding to hounds'. He laughed. He thought it was hysterical that Brian Ferry's son was now a neo-fascist conservative right-wing pro-fox-hunting numbnut. I don't think it's funny. This particular group actually seeks a return to the old 'ruling' class thing, not a modernist approach to equalising the society.

Thought for the Day : "The consequences of our actions are the scarecrows of fools and the beacons of wise men." - T H Huxley

It looks like the Full Moon Compilation may be happening, but without me on board. It appears we cannot come to any agreement re: contractual obligations/royalties. So.. 'Jonny Cash' and 'Kitty Kitty' will just have to stay home with me.

Still have not (yet) listened to that last Twelfth Night gig CD, sent to me by Mark Hughes. I just can't get past Encore Une Fois and East to West or Afghan Red or whichever track is immediately before Sequences.

Andy Murray's (a man who knows his 'bizness') suggestion for the morning: 'Make your own retro album.' Obstacle to that; I'd rather concentrate on the music I'm making now, than the music I made with others in the past. I'm interested in the present, going into the future. The past is only remotely interesting to me. But, if I could go into the 'past' past.. yes there are things I miss and would like to do again. I miss the gorgeous place I grew up in and my horse; riding through the woods and swimming her in the lake. Now.. those WERE the days. If I could spend the rest of my life doing that.. riding an autumn trail under dappled sunlight.. I would probably never think of music again.

Thought for the Day : "A warrior never gives in to fear when he is searching for what he needs." Manual of The Warrior Of Light" compiled by Paulo Coelho

While searching for stuff for Jerry Van K, I found these photographs; a Twelfth Night Primer - wow.. I really HAVE changed...

the photo from the back of the "Cunning Man" single:

must have been taken by Brian Devoil.

the photo of the band on stage.. somewhere:

courtesy of my dear friend Giles Mulholland left to right: Andy Revell, Me, Clive Mitten

on stage, Andy Revell, me and Clive Mitten:

courtesy of Giles Mulholland. Why did Andy have a moustache? I never noticed. Guys don't 'have' moustaches any more. That's funny. (courtesy of Giles Mulholland)

a photo of me onstage (I cut out whoever was standing next to me..:

courtesy of Giles again.

and finally... a photo of my old pal, Brian Devoil, drummer and 'manager of the band:

his 'Ghandi' period. I think it was taken by me.

So that's it. Thank god I'm not so FAT any more and apparently I'd run an 'auburn' tint through my hair. But it's nice to see these again. My first band.. ever... so there ya go.

...and while we're strolling down memory lane.... me and my then boyfriend... that same autumn:

courtesy, of course, of Giles Mulholland.

Paul Boyd's boy band 'No Reason' have entered the charts at No. 53. Not my kinda thing, but Paul is a friend and my occasional guitar teacher so I'll give them a plug here.

September 11th: Is this 'real world' or exercise? Where were you? I was visiting my sister in Spain. On the beach at Pals (Costa Brava) with Jim under a big blue umbrella, not a care in the world and no other people around. Meanwhile, my cousin - Shannon - was in lower Manhattan, working in Solomon Smith Barney (she's a stockbroker - yes, I know.. one of Satan's spawn... but what can you do, if she chooses to sell her soul to the devil.. Americans have the right to choose) directly across from WTC; one of those buildings that was taken down later. She saw the first plane hit and sat watching dumbfounded. Her fiance, working in the next building along phoned and said, 'we're outta here'. She saw the second plane hit Tower 2, through the rear window of the car speeding uptown. I watched the Conspiracy Theory report on Channel 4 the other night. Where were the fighter planes? The question from the scrambler, "Is this 'real world' or 'exercise'?" The answer: 'real world' and they still didn't come. My reaction on that afternoon three years ago when I heard about it: 'They did this.' (meaning those 'civilians' in the Pentagon) It seems now everyone feels the same way.

Brainstorming: Jerry Van K suggested I autograph my old Twelfth Night singles and sell them on Ebay. But why stop there? Let's brainstorm. I've got a video camera. I too can create little DVD's. We'll shoot it like a Grolsch ad: 'The adventures of an ex Twelfth Night vocalist'.. Scene 1: "Postman knocks. Sirenic female opens door wearing Arsenal FC kitchen mitts. Sings first lines of 'Keep The Aspidistra Flying'.. grabs postman (could be lecky man) in a pythonic embrace.. drag to kitchen...or maybe airing cupboard. Chords of Fur Helene and East Meets West build over mounting groans of delight. Something for Twelfth Night fans everywhere."

I have to start paying attention. The CD Mark Hughes sent me is from the LAST gig I ever did with Twelfth Night.. not the first. Nicely memorable so far with the instrumental tracks, 'Encore Une Fois' and 'East To West'. I haven't arrived at my last ever performance of 'Sequences'. I think by the time this last gig came around, I was only performing on that one song and standing at the side of the stage if I remember rightly. Ah yes. The politics of bands.

Renat, Brad's Russian lover, has decided he is crazy about the CRAWL CD and wants to come and make music. Just like that. I think I'll save the experience for a trip to Moscow. Things being up in the air here already.

Lunch with Norman Lamont yesterday.. discussing copyright and the Full Moon Compilation CD and the universe and the past and the future: his next album. He says it will be a compilation of all the 'love' songs he's written and he wants it sung by different female artists. He'll let me hear some of the potential tracks and I can maybe pick what I'd like to sing. Sounds OK. Can I be convincing singing a 'love song'? Probably. I'll drum it up from somewhere.

2 things from yesterday: received a CD from the gorgeous Mark Hughes (well.. I think he's gorgeous.. his MIND being the only part of him I know so far.. and yes.. that looks pretty good)... my first ever gig with Twelfth Night at The Target in Reading. I simply cannot listen to it yet. Too scary.

2nd thing was an email from Steve, MELA's manager, who I met for the first time at last Thursday's gig: "Loved your set, what an intense presence, not for the faint hearted." Really kind from a stranger but funny... that's a phrase my ex-husband Jef used when describing me, "not for the faint hearted." No. No faint-hearted men need apply. Steer clear, if you know what's good for you.

In the search for 'things' (photos, newsclips, recordings) for Jerry Van Kooten - found notes about a visit to Peer Southern music publishers in '92, trying to sell dance tracks from the Java Music project. I was amazed. The coals weren't even cold from the Dead Easy debacle and I was recording with other people in a completely different genre in London:-

Notes for the day, 2 September 1992, went kind of like this: "Matthew Chalk fell out of a taxi and hurt his back. So I got to see the Managing Director, Nigel Elderton, who didn't like 'This Feeling', but he did like my vocal lines or so he 'said' and promised... no, really, he didn't go that far. He 'said' he'd call some producers and see if they wanted to 'use' me. I've been here before. Re-run 4 years... Not the way .. not the door at all, indeed. But will call Mark Brogden and Ash and give them the low down. Push onward. Seek out critical mass. CRITICAL MASS. So.. he doesn't like it? Just keep going.. find someone who does."

The dilemma of all musicians, film-makers and artists. Find someone who does. Get a pair of strong walking shoes before you set out.

The night before had been a good good evening at Bannerman's. The shoes tell the story - photo courtesy Steve Wilson (when I get it from him) who I haven't seen in 2 years and was just suddenly 'there' standing behind me. The other surprise was Paul Boyd - my one time guitar teacher and also co-producer of a new boy band: No Reason, who have a single just released on 30 August. Fritz had a full line-up (even without Miyagi, who never showed) and although I didn't perform precisely to my own standards, nobody else seemed to notice. After I came off stage, Norman Lamont told me some woman next to him had said, "it's not fair. She's beautiful, she can sing AND she can whistle!" I did that little Louisiana Bayou song ('Amos Moses', the only cover I've ever done) with Fritz on drums. Norman's take (can't give you my view, I was doing it) on the set: "I liked the part where you were scaling impossible octaves, yawning and arranging your hair at the same time." I told him that's a trick I practice. The impossible octaves are the easy part. He suggested we get together. He would like to accompany me on a couple of songs for the Full Moon CD Launch Night (not APOLLO 27) on 7 October. I have two tracks coming out on that CD: 'Jonny Cash' and 'Kitty Kitty'. Will fit in nicely with the Z28's.

Always the thoughtful songsmith, Norman was on after me (solo) and did a very brief couple of tunes. After him was My Electric Love Affair, whittled down to a three-piece (who cares... give me your three pieces!). The power was there regardless and I don't even remember what the missing guitarist looked like or what he usually does. Steve, their manager, was speaking to Jim and there was a suggestion that I might lend some vocals to jam sessions and/or their next recording project. Would be happy to oblige. Also upon visiting Norman's site this morning, I read he's planning on using my voice on his next recording project. I'm sure he was going to tell me at some point.

Oh.. yeah.. I forgot. I opened my set with 'That Boy (So Beautiful)'. As usual, the women (women always love this song) were head-bobbing and 'yeah' all the way through it.. but the men looked stony-faced, shocked and silent. Jim said it's one of those songs a well-known artist saves for the last encore. Not something you hit the unsuspecting masses with right off the first stroke. He also admits he is very uncomfortable when I perform that song, but that I perform it well. As Norman said: "wet pants all 'round'". He didn't elaborate. Do I excite them or trigger incontinence?

Thought for the Day : "A warrior of light is never indifferent to injustice."

Meanwhile...back in the real world: The Southern Russia crisis has disrupted my flow of thoughts and self obsessions. Life is strange, but when hasn't it been. Too much hate in the world.. Russian schools going up in flames and Israelis lobbing missiles into refugee camps the day after... very sensitive.

Thought for the Day : "A warrior never picks fruit while it is still green."

A bit disconcerted, shocked, surprised and well.. not quite 'ready', like green fruit! Jerry Van K is as good as his word and has sent me a CD of one of my first gigs with Twelfth Night at Reading University (I seem to recall the night - Teardrop Explodes (Julian Cope?) were on - at least 20 years ago. It may have been the first gig of my life, or the second or third.. but these were my first steps on the boards fronting a band of any kind ever. I might need a stiff whisky or a 'stiff' something... (where is MY electric love affair when I need it?) prior to listening. 'Dose liberally with diazepam'. Whatever.. right now.. looking at the thing... like a dog, I've got a great urge to bury it in the garden and dig it up later. By the way, Jerry Van K is a lovely looking guy (photo not available but I've seen it) and has a website offering his lyrics, poetry, (himself??) etc...http://www.jvkooten.info

TONIGHT FULL MOON CLUB BANNERMANS**: Fritz tells me MIYAGI may be playing as well (they bring a very large crowd with them wherever they go). The line up is now all of the following people, as Fritz puts it, 'in no particular order':

""Electra, Rosie Bell, Nicotene Fingers, Mike Breen, My Electric Love Affair, Norman Lamont, William Mysterious, and FRAKture. Unconfirmed slots for Miyagi and Lee Patterson may or may not happen. We have spoken word/ poetry type stuff from Gaz Death, Ash Dickinson, Hazel Morrison, Jonathan Muirhead, Phoenix and Raol Kawalsky peppered between the music................................................................................................................................................""

[**Found a note in an email to best friend Suzy in London Feb 04: "Very much happier in some respects... about the live music thing. Performing every other week here at a very cool place [N.B. 'The Commplex'] which holds it's Full Moon Music Club on a Thursday night. Enjoying that and the vibe. But really knowing it's a LONG stretch between standing up there alone and pulling together viable musicians around me who would understand just what I'm trying to do. Maybe too long a stretch. Dreams lost and found... who knows."]

Meanwhile, back in the real world, there's scary stuff going on - The Republican Convention in New York: "They're here because of that hole in the ground downtown." Steve Earle

If that guy gets back into office, the whole shithouse is gonna go up or look like "that hole in the ground downtown".

And.. in a school in Russia.. the whole shithouse may be about to go up. What's happening there is pretty incredible. Parents and grandparents begging to be exchanged as hostages. The 'hero' shows his face.